there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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