You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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