last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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