And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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