do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Randomize
