On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Randomize
