you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize