Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize