I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I need water and some morals
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
