"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Randomize
