How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
