found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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