i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
