Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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