they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize