I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
