you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
