Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
