I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Swine flu. Run for my life!
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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