Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
