it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
