There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
