i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize