I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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