so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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