Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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