Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
