worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
