maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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