don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
that may or may not have been my penis.
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