I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
