your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Randomize