Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Come see our sink grown plant.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Randomize
