It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
