I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
