Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
