The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Randomize
