I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
