Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize
