great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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