accomplished twins. life is a go
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
