Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
