i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
