At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize
