So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
