I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
