Apparently you make a good broom.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
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