If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
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