i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
