i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
